Wolverine
by Thatgirlwhowrotestuff
Summary: Follow on from my story animal. Discover what really lies in Renesmee's future and if she decides to act upon the decision's that face her when someone offers her a life changing choice. Renesmee's p.o.v.
1. My Pack

Wolverine

_If you can't believe in the magic then what can you believe in?_

Preface

My name is Renesmee Cullen. My mother and father are vampires but when they gave birth to me she was human making me something different entirely. Technically I'm half Vampire, which means I eat human food were my family only get nutirition from drinking blood. My life is very restricted; from the day I was born my life was all planned – down to who I was going to marry. My father can be an overprotective jerk when he wants to be and my boyfriend is a werewolf.

Chapter one – My Pack

Midnight. The moon was big and bright, so large it could of almost been in reach. Only it wasn't, it was thousands of miles away nestled in the stars, a giant rock.

I sat with Jake in the long thick grass, there was no fire – only solar lighting. Billy Black had modernized his lights after the accident last year. The solar lights were nowhere near as beautiful as the forest of flames that once lit the Black's back yard but they were far 'safer' and far less likely to _burn._

There had been an accident where I had fallen into the fire and everybody I loved blamed themselves when it was all my fault, it was me who had lost my balance. It was me who had to suffer in agony. And it was me left with disfiguring scars that covered my body. My father had taken matters into his own hands and I nearly lost my Jake, he was my whole world now. The accident helped open my eyes and see what was really there loving me. ]

Jake still loved me when I couldn't look at myself in a mirror. Jake would always love me. We were soulmates. He made my skin tingle and set off fireworks that erupted inside me whenever his lips touched mine. I loved him with everything I had and one day, our wedding day, I would be able to seal that love forever.

I had grown attatched to Jake's pack. Each one of them were so amazing. Leah had become one of my best friends, I pitied her. She was such a sweet girl stuck in a wolf's body. She loved her pack leader and never stopped loving him – after everything he did! I guess you could call me a hipocrite cause I also valued my friendship when Emily, she was after all going through everything I was going through; a love so powerful you can't do anything but accept it, and when you do you discover it is the most brilliant thing: more than any girl could ever wish for.

I loved my days with Jacob Black, even if I didn't get many. The terms had stretched to weekends cause 'Schoolwork was my number one priority' well, according to my mother. Sometimes they acted so _human. _

I nustled into Jake's warm torso, his heat was comforting and almost made me drowsy. It wasn't like the heat from the burn, it didn't even remind me of that heat. This was _my_ heat, from _my _Jake. Safety.

"I think I broke my leg yesterday" Seth moaned, rubbing it uncomfortably.

"You think?!" I laughed, "Did it hurt?" I asked curiously. I liked Seth, we had so much in common – our friendship with Vampires, our youth and we both went to the same school; we were in the same year and everything.

"Yeah it blooming hurt" he said patting his leg contently.

"You should let Carlisle take a look, make sure the bones set straight" I suggested.

"Yeah" He nodded. "Suppose"

"Whats wrong with the doctor here on the reservation?" Leah chirped in.

"Try what if he wants to take my temperature?" Seth said matter-of-factly,

"Leah, build a bridge and get over it. Carlisle is the best doctor for miles, with the most expericence" I had to look behind me to make sure it was actually Jake sat there. _The best doctor?_

"Hundreds of years for experience" Leah sniggered.

Sometimes it bothered me how they just simply can't accept my Vampire family. They called then "Bloodsuckers" behind my back but never to my face, I heard Jake call my father a "Filthy bloodsucker" a few days after I was born, This memory haunted my nightmares.

"Hey! Thats Ness's Grandpa your talking about and she's one of us" Sam winked at me, he was like a third Grandpa to me sometimes, possibly because he was the Alpha so everybody sort of looked up to him in a way.

"_One of us" _he had said. That made me feel all warm inside, like I was actually a pack member – Like family.

_If only. _

If only could change into the most ferotious beast whenever I wanted, feel the wind in my fur and the wolf in my heart. If only I was born that way – not a _bloodsucker_ but something much more exhilarating, Something with fur. _If only._


	2. Unmasked

Chapter two – Unmasked

Jake dropped me off at my human friend Angela's house. My mother said she was babysitting me, which is really patronising seen as I'm only slightly younger than her. The family had gone out on a hunting trip like most weekends. Angela was really nice to me, My mother told her I was her cousin that had come over to live in Forks for awhile.

Staying with Angela was like having a sleepover; we would eat icecream, talk about boys, watch scary movies and not go to sleep until the early hours of the morning. However I didn't like saying goodbye to Jake, it was getting harder and harder and I just wished that I never had to.

I sat on Angela's bed and she sat on her twirling computer chair, the radio was on quietly and I was flicking through Angela's magazines. "It's Ben's birthday next week and I have no idea what to get him" and moaned.

"Why don't you get him a computer game?" I suggested, closing the magazine.

"I'de get the wrong one" she sighed, "He only likes the martial arts kind and I'm pretty sure he's got them all"

"Erm.. A DVD?" I shrugged, "What about that comedy horror that's just come out?"

"Urgh, he's seen it" she said standing to her feet. "This is useless" she admitted.

"I'm hungry" she said walking out of the room, I got up and followed her into the kitchen.

She grabbed two chocolate bars out of the fridge then sat at the breakfast bar with me. "I'll just get him chocolate, he likes chocolate" she said passing me a bar. I nodded, "Who dosen't like chocolate?" I laughed.

"Chocolate is my best friend" she said breaking a piece off.

"Oh thanks" I laughed,

"Besides my people best friends" she smiled.

We ate in silence for a minute and then she looked at me.

"Do you have a secret that you wish you could tell somebody but you really can't?" she asked me. I thought about my secret, my half Vampire genes. I never really had the desire to tell anybody –everybody already knew who had to know. I shrugged "Suppose" I said.

"Why?" I then asked putting my chocolate down, I loved gossip.

"I can't say" she said getting up and walking into the lounge.

"Oh come on!" I moaned following her. "You have to tell me now"

"Nah, it dosen't matter" she looked like she had already said too much. This was going to be a task and a half getting this out of her, Was she pregnant? Was she moving away forever? What was the secret?!

I had tactics, not very good tactics but I had some. I went and sat next to her on the sofa.

"Is it about Ben?" I asked, okay my tactics were pretty poor.

"No" she answered, grabbing the remote.

I snatched it out of her hand, I wasn't finished. "Are you moving away?" I asked .

"What? No" she looked confused "I'm not going anywhere"

I was running out of questions "Are you going to tell me ever?" I gave her my best puppy dog eye look.

"I don't know if I can tell anybody" she whispered.

I took a deep breath, What was she trying to imply? Was she a Vampire? No. She'de have Red or Golden eyes and her's were blue.

"Okay, I'll tell you." She said flicking her hair out of her face. "If I can't tell you then who can I tell? I know you'll believe me and I think you'll understand" she bit her lip. "I'm a Sourceress, a witch. My mother was a witch too, it's in our blood. This may all sound odd but I know what your parents are – I know what you are and I've known all along. Everytime I saw Bella when she was human I had to bite my lip, I should of warned her but I had a feeling she already knew." She looked at me and I realised I hadn't breathed a word.

"A witch?" I whispered. She nodded, smiling. "So you can do spells and have a pointy hat, a black cat and a broomstick right?" I raised an eyebrow at her.

"That's what it says in the storybooks but the storybooks are so far from the truth, Edward is hardly Count dracula and I'm hardly the Wicked Witch of the East" She shrugged "But yeah, I can do charms and spells and I can throw together a good potion"

I took a deep breath. Imagine having all that power at your fingertips... A _Sourceress_. My mind locked on that word, it had great power and certainty.

"Do you want me to Charm something so you'll believe me?" She asked looking around the room for a victim. "No, no of course not" I breathed.

"Will this have implications on you?" I asked. "Maybe you shouldn't of told me, I wouldn't want you to get in trouble" I felt a tinge of guilt.

"It could have implications, if the secret got out. We have laws we have to follow and I just broke a few of them by telling you, I broke another by being your friend. Vampires and Witches aren't suppost to mingle" she said.

"I'm only half Vampire so does that mean you only broke half of that law?" I asked leaning back into the sofa.

She half laughed, "I doubt I'll get half the punishment though" she suddenly looked glum.

"Whats the penalty for breaking their laws?" I asked, I already knew the answer.

"Death" she said quietly.


	3. Spell bound

Chapter three – Spell bound

I always knew Forks was an odd place but now the only human (besides my grandpa) I had tried to get close to had turned out to be a witch! I was mostly suprised that the humans didn't know, they must of been so stupid not to realise a vampire coven, a pack of werewolves and family of witches living amongst them.

I couldn't help but feel I was the most boring creature amongst them. Vampires had always been normal to me and I was only half as interesting as them! Witches were powerful women who could do magic, _Vampires can't do magic. _Werewolves were magnificent beasts that growled in the face of danger and I was the little half human who let everybody else fight her battles. Half humans don't have half human laws and it was enough to make me believe I shouldn't exist.

I looked to the stars, wondering what other creatures lived under those same stars; Mermaids? Dragons and Knights? Anything was beginning to seem possible. I bet unicorns exist, I thought to myself.

I glanced over to where Angela was sleeping and she was completly dead to the world, I sighed and got to my feet, as I walked across the hall I noticed the door to Angela's parent's room had been left ajar. They were out of town on buisness weren't they?

I peeked my head in the door, it looked the same as a human's room but so did Angela's blue on white color scheme. The bed was empty and the sheets were made perfectly. The walls were painted green and had a dark brown trim, apart from the bed there was nothing in the room but a cluttered bookcase.

Was there such a thing as a spell book? I though to myself, Or is that just another thing humans made up? I walked over to the bookcase and noticed that none of the bindings had titles on them – only roman numerals. They weren't in order and all the colors were mixed together. I picked up a scarlet book, number 5. It looked rarther new so I felt kinda foolish as I opened the first page, "Letter E, World Encyclopedia" An encyclopedia – how stupid was I? These weren't spell books! I shoved the book back into the shelf roughly – angry at myself for being so intrusive. The plywood bookshelf shook, I hadn't realised my own strength. A thick book landed on my head with a thud, sending me to my knees. "Ow" I said outloud.

Where had that book fallen from? The books on the shelves were all brightly colored with the numerals but this book was thick and look aged, the brown leather binding was torn at the edges and some of the pages hung loose. I curiously opened the book and the pages flicked violently out of my control. I didn't touch it again until it revealed a page I couldn't of found if I had searched. The title read – Shapeshifting.

It was a recipe, a recipe for a potion that could only be made by a witch. I hadn't heard of most of the ingredients and I didn't know where I could find them, they all sounded mythical. I mean, what on earth is a twickenweed?

"You found our book" Angela leaned in the doorframe. I snapped the book shut leaving the corner folded so I could find it again. "I'm sorry" I said getting to my feet and putting the book ontop of the bookcase. "The bang must of woken you" I said. It wasn't a question.

"My mother charmed that book so it only shows you the recipe your heart desires" Angela took the book from the bookcase and placed it on the ground. The pages started flicking violently like they had before and stopped on a page that read – summoning potion. A potion that when poured down a corpse's throat reawakens the spirit.

"My brother died when I was only young, male witches aren't allowed to exist. Whenever I open this book the same potion comes up" she said without emotion, slamming the book shut then passing it to me. "Your go" she encouraged. "How bad can your hearts desires be?" she asked.

I didn't answer. Instead I opened the book myself revealing the Shapeshifting potion. "Oh" she said.

"Is there really such a thing?" I asked her.

She nodded. "That kind of magic is Forbidden, against our laws that I told you about. So is the summoning potion.. Dark magic" she couldn't go against her rules right? "Plus Twickenweed is protected by the Elders" she said putting the book back in it's place.

"Elders?" Like the Vampires Elders? That had been around for thousands of years? Or like the werewolf Elders? The older generation? I'de seen witches age myself.

"Pure bloods" she said flattening the bed where she had wrinkled the sheets "They're like royalty because the males are accepted amongst them but not amongst us"

"Why?" I asked curiously. "Because they are more powerful witches if the father contains witch blood, far too powerful to live amongst humans unconspicuously" she said. A world were men weren't needed, only in powerful society.

The Shapeshifting potion seemed a thousand miles away, it wasn't even a possibility with these Elders making up the rules. "Whats so dangerous about shapeshifting anyway?" I asked, Jake did it almost everyday.

"When a witch, or a human, enters a animals body the animal's soul has nowhere to go besides into the human's body. It's like bodyswapping and the animal is left in control of your body and you never find your body again or your body is destoryed then your trapped inside the animals body forever" she said flattly.


	4. Misfit

"Your mother and father aren't to know about this right?" Angela smiled as we ate yet more chocolate, like we had the day before.. like two human girls. "Not about the magic and not about the forbidden spells, we aren't even suppost to know about them" I nodded "It's not my secret to tell" I then paused realising what she had said. "How do you know about them then?" I asked.

"Do you actually think my mother is a-?" she laughed, "There is no where near enough people in forks with feet problems to own a foot surgery" She was right, forks was only small.

"What are they then?" I asked. She sighed, "They're Elders" she said shaking her head "But you don't know that either" she scowled. I was breaking into dangerous territory. "So they have the ingredients?" I asked, she shook her head, "Not going to happen" she said, reading into my words.

"They have them all locked away, the keys are disguised as objects using a spell and each Elder has a key in her household but It doesnt even matter, I couldn't help if I wanted to and I don't exactly want to." She rolled her eyes. "Why would you want animals to be left in control of your body anyway?"

"My stupid vampire-human body?" I asked sarcastically. "They can have it."

"What about your dad?" Angela raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah, cause he'de know which wolf I was." I laughed. "It doesn't matter though right? Its not going to happen." I put the chocolate down,I wasn't hungry anymore. Angela's blue eyes rested on mine as she saw the obvious heartache this was causing me, I could never be anything more than a halfbreed of two species that I don't want to belong to. A misfit.

She put her arm around me shoulders, "Jacob loves you the way you are." Angela told me. "I hear his thoughts from time to time, only when my mother is casting spells in the other room and one member of the pack is near, which is rare. But I hear enough to realise your always on his mind." She assured me.

"Yeah," I nodded, "I know he loves me, I love him. It's just I don't like the times when we are apart, when he is running with the pack and I'm sitting with the vampires."

She shrugged, "Maybe he needs time like that, just him and his friends. He doesn't have them forever." She pointed out, The other members of the pack had imprinted on human girls which meant they would have to stop changing as soon as they could so their bodies could age and their partners did. However Jake had no need to start aging, cause I wouldn't. He was immortal, the others would die.

I felt so selfish.

"Your right." I nodded. "please can you take me home." I asked, it was light but my parents would be waiting for me anyway. They didn't sleep.

The car drive home was spent talking about Ben and his birthday. How Angela was throwing him a suprise party and how I really had to go, because she was ordering a cake in the shape of a ninja and she had payed his favourite local band to play. I promised to go, but I wasn't exactly listening.

I didn't tell my parents. Mostly because I'm not dim. My father would of kicked off and my mother would of stopped me from going to angela's instead I went straight to my room where I found aunt alice sat on my bed.

"Nessie," she smiled hugging me tightly,

"Hey Alice, are you okay?" I raised an eyebrow as well as I could.

"Yeah, it's just.. I saw you in a vision" Alice didn't say anymore as my bedroom door burst open.

"Angela's a witch!?" My dad was closly followed my mum.

"You want to be a werewolf." She stated.

I sighed and sat on my canopy bed, holding my head in my hands. "Ergh." I said. How come I couldn't block my thoughts.

"It is rude to invade peoples personal thoughts." I tried to guide the convosation away pathetically, it failed.

My mom sat next to me, "I'm sorry" she said. "I'm not apoligising for your genes though, only for the way you feel. I see you would of made a different choice, and I shouldn't of been able to decide for you."

"Thats just stupid." I argued. "She is a witch, but I promised not to tell. And I didn't for the record." I pointed around to make sure everyone was perfectly clear. "I don't want to be a werewolf anymore, I don't think." I nodded.

My dad threw his hands up in the air, "Of course you do," he said "And I'm sorry Renesmee but you can't even deny that to yourself." He raved.

I held my hand out to his and he took it. I showed him everything that had I had wanted. The greenery, the trees passing by – hundreds of them, The crazy speed and the wind rushing through my golden fur. Freedom, Jake running just out of the corner of my eye and the whole pack, 30 of them, behind him. The moon in the sky and the world at my paws. I then showed him the scene at the caravan with Jake and Paul arguing over who gets the last hotdog, marshmallows on the fire and a pack – a whole family of them – sitting around happily.

My dad looked at me in a way I had never seen before as I took my hand away from his, it was as though he really understood.

The room was deadly silent and I sighed, "but it's alright? I don't need all that." I told them. "I need you lot, family. I need my aunts and my uncles and my grandparents. I can't be part of their family and part of yours in any way than the way I am now. I tie the two together, without me..." I paused,

"Your right," Carlisle said.


End file.
